Three Common Fears of Birth Mothers

When a birth mother is considering placing her child for adoption, it can be a very stressful time. Many different emotions will be running through her head as she thinks about what will be best for her baby and herself, and fear is one of the most prominent emotions felt by many birth mothers.

It is important for pregnant young women or teenagers contemplating placing their child for adoption to know they are not alone in this process, and many pregnant women have had those same fears. Professional staff and counselors at adoption agencies can help these women through this process so they are happy with their ultimate decision, whatever it may be.

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1. Abuse

One fear birth mothers have is that the adopting family will abuse or neglect the child. Since the birth mother is unable to be with the child and see what is happening, the scary thought in the back of their mind grows.

Adoptive parents are screened and interviewed thoroughly. No adoption agency wants to place a child to someone who might harm them in any way. It is an understandable fear, but it is not one that becomes a reality.

2. Loss

A pregnant woman carries her child for nine months. During those nine months, a bond is formed between mother and child, a bond only an expecting mother can really understand. So when the time comes for the baby to be born and then placed with an adoption agency or adoptive couple, a feeling of loss can certainly be felt. Though it is the birth mother’s decision to place the child for adoption, the feeling can sometimes persist.

It can be difficult to let go, especially if there is an attachment present between mother and child. However, it is important for the birth mother to remember there were many reasons for the decision they made, and they are doing what they know to be best for their child. Having counseling and support from the adoption agency will also make a difference.

3. Reunion

The idea of meeting a child who was placed for adoption once he or she has grown up can be terrifying for some. This draws mainly from the fear that the child could resent the birth mother when they are reunited.

If a birth mother decides she wants to meet her child, and the adoptive family and child feel the same way, then a reunion can be a good opportunity to tell her story and explain why she placed the child for adoption. Remember the adopted child will have their own life with their own parents and family, so it is best to respect that but having an open adoption is a great way to maintain some kind of contact with them if both parties agree to it.

There are many adoptions stories online of birth mothers discussing not only reunion but also the fears they experienced when they were placing their children for adoption. Reading these stories and testimonials could help put pregnant young women and teens’ minds at ease.

Fears can be expected during the adoption process, and there can be pain involved afterwards. Speaking with an adoption agency with birth mother services and support groups can really make the difference and make the entire process much easier for young women considering placing a child for adoption.

About Providence Place

Placing a child for adoption is an important decision that requires careful consideration. Are you contemplating this loving option? Do you have any idea about how or where to start? Action Adoption at Providence Place can help. We will guide you through the process while making sure all your questions are answered. Contact us today to learn more.

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