When 22-year old Amanda found out she was expecting in October 2010, she was on drugs with no job, car or way to support herself. Realizing what a difficult position she was in, Amanda made a very selfless and noble decision for her baby. But it wasn’t made without a lot of inner struggle and conflicting emotions.
“When I found out I was pregnant I considered parenting because everything was great in my mind when I was on drugs. I was super happy I was having a baby but then as I became more and more sober, I began to realize this was something I couldn’t do.”
With the help of her mother, Amanda found Methodist Mission Home (MMH). “My mom saw how depressed I was when dealing with the realization of not being able to raise my baby and she mentioned adoption.” After reading about Methodist Mission Home on the internet, Amanda’s mother told her about it and convinced her to meet with someone at MMH.
She was hesitant about the idea of adoption when she first met with MMH counselor Carrie Clemens but after much thought she knew she had to face the reality of the situation. She knew she could not support her baby as he deserved and didn’t want him growing up in an unhealthy, stressful environment.
It was then when Amanda agreed to see some family profiles. “Carrie sent me about five and I didn’t really click with any of them until I read Chris and Jamie’s.” Amanda explained she ultimately chose Chris and Jamie to parent her baby because of their loving hearts. They had already adopted a baby and she felt having an adopted sibling would give her baby someone to relate to.
In April 2011, Amanda gave birth to Baby David. “I knew when I saw him I was making the right choice but it was hard.” Amanda is so grateful she found Chris and Jamie and trusts them completely to give David everything she is not able to give him.
She maintains a great relationship with them and even attended David’s Baptism. “They constantly send me pictures and for Christmas they sent me a special DVD which tracked his days all the way up until 8 months.”
Amanda fears one day David will feel as though she abandoned him but shares how she has faith that when he’s older he’ll understand she did what was best for him.
“I think adoption is the best route any parent can take when they find themselves in a situation of not being able to provide for their baby. It’s not fair to force them into a stressful environment when they can be with parents who are ready for them- like Chris and Jamie.”
For Amanda, it wasn’t a question of being able to love David or not. She just wanted to give him the world and knew she wouldn’t be able to.